HIV stigma drives Lusaka man to court
By Charles Musonda
A 52-YEAR-OLD man of Lusaka’s Kabanana Township has told the Matero Local Court that he fears dying of depression because of the stigma his wife has subjected him to since his HIV-positive status became known.
The man testified that he married his wife in 2009 and that they have two children, aged 14 and seven.
The man said he lived well with his wife for only six months after their marriage, after which they started arguing and quarrelling over petty issues.
“When we quarrel, it is tit for tat. My wife has no respect because she always wants to be on top as if I am not a man. This always results in fights. She beats and hits me with hard objects like iron bars and cooking sticks, and I run away from home,” the man said.
He said his fear of his wife’s alleged violent conduct drove him to seek solace in other women, where he eventually contracted HIV.
The man told the court that one day, his wife’s first-born son from a previous relationship, whom he described as being on the verge of becoming a junkie, broke some household goods, including valuable electronic equipment, but his wife allegedly sided with the boy instead of rebuking him.
He said he was unhappy with what he described as his wife’s lack of respect and excessive stigma against him following his HIV status.
The man testified that he was also worried that his condition and the stress he was experiencing could affect his work as a driver at a security company and potentially cause him to have a road accident, resulting in the loss of innocent lives.
He told the court that his love for his wife had waned.
However, Matero Local Court senior magistrate Harriet Mulenga questioned how the man who claimed he no longer loved his wife, could have had sexual relations with her shortly before appearing in court, according to his own testimony.
In her defence, the woman said her husband had deserted the matrimonial home for seven years and returned HIV-positive.
She said her husband left home because he wanted to marry another woman and that he had a seven-year-old child with the same woman.
The woman said her son had given her K5,000 to keep for him but later felt pity for him when he became sick while alone without his relatives.
She said, fearing that her husband could die, her son suggested that the K5, 000 be used for his medication and other related needs until he recovered and started working.
The woman said her son had only asked her husband to refund his money and had not subjected him to the violence he alleged against his stepson.
She further told the court that she had stopped stigmatising her husband after receiving advice from church members.
But Magistrate Mulenga said she did not see any major issue warranting divorce, saying the couple was old enough to control themselves.
Magistrate Mulenga said there was a disease in the household which the woman had accepted, although she was not taking antiretroviral (ARV) medication while Imanga was.
“I have not seen any proper grounds for divorce. Go and sit together, try to talk, and if you fail, that is when you will come back here,” Magistrate Mulenga said.
She advised the woman to stop reminding her husband about his HIV status, stressing that HIV was not a death sentence.
The magistrate, however, warned the man against the habit of having children anyhow.
Magustrate Mulenga refused to grant divorce and encouraged the couple to sit down and resolve their differences before returning to court.
