Court dissolves 30-year marriage over beatings, forced sex and death threats
By Tito Kalama
A MARRIAGE of nearly 30 years has been dissolved by the Chelstone Local Court after a domestic worker told the court her husband had subjected her to years of savage beatings, forced sex and death threats.
Elina Nayeme, 48, told Magistrate Charity Milambo that the violence at the hands of her husband, Thanmu Daka, 54, a security guard of Ng’ombe East township, had grown so severe that their own children were forced to physically intervene to protect her from his attacks.
Nayeme, who petitioned the court for divorce citing prolonged domestic violence, verbal abuse and sexual abuse, told Magistrate Milambo that Daka was a heavy drinker and smoker who would forcibly demand sexual intercourse even when she arrived home exhausted from work late at night.
She told the court that the relentless abuse had rendered her home a place of fear, pushing her to a breaking point that threatened both her life and her mental wellbeing.
“I’m afraid because he usually would threaten me by saying ‘wena Kumanda nawena ku jele’ [One will end up in the grave and the other in prison.] Grant us the divorce, I can no longer live with such a man,” she pleaded with the Court.
Nayeme told the court that Daka routinely hurled insults at her and physically attacked her in the presence of their five children, who would desperately rush to pull their father off their mother each time he turned violent.
Daka, who did not deny the abuse, admitted to insulting and beating his wife but sought to justify his conduct by claiming she had repeatedly withheld conjugal rights whenever he demanded them.
When Magistrate Milambo asked whether he wished to remain in the marriage, Daka said he was opposed to divorce but would ultimately respect his wife’s decision.
The court also heard a damning account from Nayeme’s father, who was granted permission to address the court.
He recalled a humiliating incident in which Daka summoned him to come and collect his daughter, branded her a prostitute in his presence, and then forced him to carry her belongings on his head as he escorted her back to his home.
Nayeme’s father also said Daka had only paid a paltry K8 as dowry and had never settled the full lobola.
Magistrate Milambo granted the divorce.
She ruled that the union was legally defective from its inception on the grounds that Daka had failed to pay dowry, a requirement recognised under the law.
“The law has changed. Cohabitation is no longer automatically recognised as marriage. A union is legally valid only when lobola has been paid in full or in part,” she said.
She also noted that Daka’s swift acceptance of the divorce suggested he wanted to be free, particularly since Nayeme had agreed to take sole responsibility for their five children.
Magistrate Milambo advised Nayeme to escalate the matter to the Subordinate Court if she so wished for property or any applicable divorce settlements, as such matters fell outside the jurisdiction of the local court.
